I apologize for not being a faithful blogger! I have been so busy lately with school and work that I haven't had much time to blog but I felt really inspired this evening and wanted to share the joy. I went into my email inbox tonight and saw an email from a current student of mine. I just met her during our first session last Saturday and Sunday. She is fourteen and was very shy and insecure at first. During the first day of class each student gives a little presentation about themselves to help us get to know them. This student, in particular, shared that she had never worn high heels before that day, and never wears dresses. I could sense that she was unsure of herself and sent her an email that first night with a few encouraging words. We have emailed back and forth throughout the week, but her email tonight was the most special of all!
She sent me a long email saying that she learned so much from our first weekend together and that she already noticed a feeling of confidence in herself. She thanked me for taking the time to help her and talk to her about her life. The best sentences of all said, "Thank you so much Miss Kayla for everything, you have changed my life. I hope to be like you one day." Just writing about this brings me to tears... I feel so blessed to have a job that allows me to help others. Working with teenagers makes me want to be the best person that I can be. Not many people are fortunate enough to feel so fulfilled by their jobs. Some people read inspirational quotes and stories to feel uplifted and have a reminder about how great life can be- but I think about each girl that I have taught, and how much they have changed my life. And for that, I am so lucky.
Have a wonderful evening everyone and God bless!
For those of you who I have not been able to talk to over the past few months, you may not know that I was struggling with the decision to or not to compete for Miss Delaware this year. My college had informed me that my full scholarship was non-renewable, and expires on my 23rd birthday. This would mean that if I were to win Miss Delaware 2010 I would sacrifice my last year of a full tuition scholarship, to be able to fulfill my lifelong dream.
I spent months (literally), going back and forth about whether or not I should compete for Miss Delaware again. There was not a day that went by that I didn't think about it. I called my friends, former local directors and titleholders and family to help me weigh out all of my options. I felt crushed knowing that I could be sacrificing a full scholarship to attend a wonderful private school that I could not otherwise afford, or sacrificing the opportunity to live out my dream.
As you may know now, I decided about TWO weeks ago that I needed and wanted to compete again this year. I knew there were very few local pageants left, and I was so fortunate that one was being held that Saturday (just a few days later). I called my dear friends Julia, Julie, Chris, Brittany and Laura after talking to my parents about my decision- so that everyone could know that I had essentially changed my mind.
After emailing and writing back and forth to my Alopecia penpals across the country, and hearing how proud they are of me and how supportive they were of whatever decision I made, I knew exactly what I wanted to do. It warms my heart to know that whether I place in the top 5 at Miss Delaware or not, I have girls with Alopecia who are proud of me for just having the confidence to compete. Every year, the Alopecia community has supported and embraced me on my journey to becoming Miss Delaware- with and without a wig. I was told recently by a young girl with Alopecia that I am her hero whether I win Miss Delaware or not. This was a defining moment for me, and I knew that I should not let any opportunity to live out my dream, pass me by.
And SO, I competed for Miss Kent County March 7th because it was the very next local pageant. The competition was tough, and I was unsure of what the outcome would be. I danced to Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" and had such a great time being back on the stage. At the end of the night Erin Magnin was announced as 1st Runner Up, and my name was called as Miss Kent County 2010. I am so excited to start preparing for Miss Delaware RIGHT AWAY!!!! And I am honored to be following in the footsteps of one of my closest friends, Miss Kent County 2009, Julia Fuller (1st RU to Miss Delaware 2008 and 4th RU to Miss Delaware 2009). I have VERY big shoes to fill, but I am up for the challenge :) AND it is Julia's birthday today!!! SO don't forget to wish her a happy birthday!
Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me throughout the years, and to all my Miss Delaware friends for supporting my last minute decision to compete. I promise I will make Kent County, and all of you proud in June!